Project: Full Life · Random & Personal

♥ My Shallow View of a Happy Birthday ♥

So, I’m one year older and hopefully one year wiser and kinder too. One thing about me is that I make a big deal out of my birthday ever since. I like planning for my birthday. I’m not into parties, though. But, I’d like to spend it with my loved one/s in a relaxed mood while enjoying good food and good movie of my preferences. It’s a day when I’d become the boss. That’s why when the kids arrived, my husband and I have always planned a day without them so we can focus on me and on what I want to do and/or buy for my birthday.
This birthday, however, fell short of my low expectations. First, I have no new birthday ring which is supposedly my 10th birthday ring from my husband. He started giving me one in 2007 when he was still courting me. A little flashback. I still remember that cold windy day in Tagaytay while we were enjoying hot Bulalo in a nipa hut overlooking some forests. He knelt before me and handed me a ring with single stone. Shocked as I was that he was like proposing to me, I knew right then and there that he was indeed the one for me. When I accepted and he stood up, he gave me another pair of rings with our names engraved. You see, I’ve always dreamt of a man to sweep me off my feet away. I’ve always dreamt of marrying a man who would ask my hand for marriage after of just a month of knowing me. I don’t know. I find it highly romantic for a guy to be so decisively in love with me that he does not want to let me go even if we’re only getting to know each other for less than a year.
Forward to 2016, as I said I did not get my ring because we decided to spend it for the house improvement. I forgot it would have been the 10th year of our mini-tradition and I never realized I’d feel bad for not fulfilling it. We also scheduled moving our belongings to our house from my parents’ on my birthday weekend because we have no other dates available. We want to celebrate Christmas in our new home. In fairness to my husband, he went home early and took me and the kids out despite exhaustion and lack of sleep. I was touched and it made my day a little brighter. Until the kids got tired and requested to eat donuts instead of my preferred restaurants. Then, I found out I lost some money which I just hurriedly put in my pocket before we left home. Tired of the kids, irritated by the lost money and blaming myself for it ON MY BIRTHDAY made me so upset the rest of the day. I even regretted leaving the house. Something which may have hurt my husband’s feeling, I know. Thankfully, he’s patient and understanding enough to let me get away with my bad mood.
Okay, I don’t exactly know why I’m telling you all these. Obviously, I seemed to have the most unfavorable birthday to date. However, I also realized that I’m not in the proper perspective. I should be thanking God for the gift of life and I should be wishing for good health, safety and abundance for me and my loved ones. I should be wishing for an easy and safe pregnancy and healthy normal baby. I should be happy for another year spent with my family, husband, and kids. Losing money is painful but I should be trusting God’s plans and promise that whatever is lost would be replaced tenfold. These essentials were overshadowed by my shallow view of a happy birthday.
Today, I’m feeling better. The husband and I finally had some quality and quiet time together, just the two of us. Sometimes, that’s all I need amidst all the chaos in life. The sanctuary of our marriage. Thank you, Lord, for my birthday!

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